Feeling Fustrated

I just don't know what to do. I have an otherwise perfectly content baby during the day, and at night, all hell breaks loose. I honestly feel like I don't know what I am doing with Simon, and the screaming that he does...I just don't know if I can handle it any longer. I really feel like flying off the handle sometimes! At night, he has a quick little cat nap at around 6:30, and I give him a bath at around 7-7:15, give him a bottle around 7:30, and you would think that he would be sleepy and just go to sleep, right? No, he then proceeds to scream for about an hour to hour and a half later. I know he is tired, but c'mon, what do I do? He does the screaming thing during the day too, especially right when he needs to go to sleep. I don't feel like I have help most of the time either. I really feel like I am holding a screaming baby all the friggin time! I am just at a loss, and feel so incompetent as a mom. Let's see if I can upload some pics of the little devil.

Ok, we will try this again...

Let's see how long this last this time. :) This past year has flown by, I look at my baby, and she is just that in these photos, she has gotten so much bigger now. There doesn't seem to be a trace of baby in her anymore. That makes me a little sad. But, alas, I've got another one to watch over now. Simon Gabriel has come into our lives and has blessed us greatly. This little one is just perfect. He was born on Tuesday, August 26th at 12:58 pm. (Thank you simon, I was able to still order lunch from the cafeteria!) His birth was just about perfect....
Monday I had my 41 week appointment, and I knew nothing was going on, so I told the doc to just spare me the pain and don't worry about checking to see if I was dialated. So at about 1:30 in the morning on Tuesday, I started having some mild contractions. I started really noticing them around 3, and they started to be consistent. At about 4 I told Gregg not to worry about going in to work, and he just rolled over and went back to sleep. I went on ahead to take a shower, and get something to eat. Around 5:30, I went and called my brother to see if they can come down to watch Olivia, get this, he asked if he could wait till 6 to call his boss, he didn't want to call any earlier unless it was an emergency...whatever. I called mom to go on ahead and make the 3 hour drive up, I knew she would be up getting ready for work. Around 6:45 Mike and Melissa show up to watch Olivia, and about 7:15 we went on ahead to drive up to the hospital...we ended up having to drive up to St. Joseph because St. Lukes was full. At about 8, we were in our room (there was a bit of traffic), and after the most painful cervical check I had ever endured, I heard the nurse said to go on ahead and admit me, I was a 5!! At about 10:30 they administered the most wonderful epi, and after waiting around at about 12:45, we were ready to have a baby!! After about 5 pushes, literally 10 minutes later, Simon was here! I'll show pics later!!

Bad Blogger!! Bad Blogger!!

I should be ashamed of myself! All I do is stalk * I mean look at other blogs, but have a hard time posting on my blog! It seems like I have these really cute ideas to talk about, but when I get to the computer, my mind goes blank. (It tends to go blank quite often throughout the day though). So, a small little Olivia update, cuz that is all that is going on in my life right now...
..she is now starting to repeat some words...just like I was cooking tonight, and holding onto her (I know, it's dangerous, but seriously, how else do you cook dinner with a screaming toddler at your feet?) and I was trying to teach her "hot!" exaggerating it, and pulling my arm back...it was cute that she repeated the word and the action.
...she loves to lotion herself up after bath, and loves to try to put her pants on...mostly her little swimmers, she can get up to three on a leg--it's pretty humerous.
...she can wipe her nose...we will say "wipe your nose!" and she will put the kleenex up to her nose...and on another note she tries to wipe herself when I change her diaper with a diaper wipe...kinda funny
...gosh, she is saying more words, but of course (mind is blank) I can't think of a d*mn one!!

We went to the Deanna Rose petting zoo this past weekend, it was pretty fun! Here are a few pics!! She is my little artist in training!!

Oh wow, it's September already!!

Wow. I've been so busy. Full time working moms, how do you do it? I really haven't posted because I just haven't had the time or energy. I seriously can't wait to start working part time. Last week in September, man, I hope I can last that long. :)
So, updates....
***school is...well, school. There are good days, and bad days, good classes and bad classes. It's not too bad though. I am always thinking of if I wasn't teaching, what else would I be doing, and would I enjoy it more?

****my birthday was the 6th, and I am in my last year of my 20's. Kinda freaked out about that. 30 isn't old at all, but it is getting up there...I don't feel any older though (well, except for the regular aches and pains...)

****Olivia will be 16 months this month on the 24th. So far, she can say
banana hi
bear bye-bye
shoe cat
sit (sounds more like another word) dog
book
I know there are more, but that is what I can think of. Right now, dirt and sticks are the girl's best friends. She will tool around for hours picking up sticks or playing in the garden if I would let her. I really don't like it, but she is having fun. She will point to the things that she wants, and has the best temper tantrums around!! She loves to save her whiny/crying ones for me when I get home. Love that. Any way, here are a few pics from the past month...

From the garden

First week down!!

So, I finally finished the first week of school--with the students. Went through the first day do's/don't's about 18 times. I AM EXHAUSTED. For those who work and have full time jobs, in addition to a baby, I don't know how you do it. I can hardly keep my eyes open. I was going over a lot of the things I say to Gregg, and he thought it was funny..."...oh, I am so sad to see (insert table number) isn't following directions..." "...raise your hands if you can tell me what is NOT ok to touch in the Art Room?" "....oh, I love how (insert table number) looks ready spagetti to line up..." The list can go on. I have to go by table numbers because there is no way I can have all of their names memorized right now. They really have no clue, and it is pretty funny to watch me compliment one table and all other tables start scrambling around so I can call their table to compliment. Good stuff. One thing I learned this week? I am not meant for Kindergarten or First Grade. I can handle second grade, but first and K just not for me. Good thing I will only have them till the end of September. By then, I will gladly hand the reigns over to their teacher. High school was so much easier I think! I could tell them what needed to get done, we would go over it, and I would set them to work-they didn't have to hear the glue speech, (they did need the ruler speech tho), they didn't need me to see who was "ready spagetti" to start working....

I would love to post new pics of the Missy O, but she is moving way too fast for my point and shoot camera. Any ideas anyone? I would love a new camera (oh, I've got plans...) but right now it just isn't in the "Dave Ramsey Plan"....
Off for now, it's 8:00 on a Friday, and I'm ready for bed!!

Busy, Busy, Busy!!

This time of year just seems to get so hectic! I feel like I have a million and one things to get done, and about 2 days to do it in. Monday the kiddos come back to school--we don't see them though. It's crazy, I feel like I need another week in my room to be ready, but the funny thing is I feel more prepared this year than I have in the past at the highschool. I just hope this year sails by without any huge bumps. I just am nervous about the kiddos, I know that they are a little rougher bunch than the kids at the highschool. These guys have problems like, am I going to get something to eat tonight, where as the highschoolers biggest probblem was where were they going to get their pedicure at... Big differences, but I truely am excited. It is seeming a little easier than I expected it to be, but then again, I haven't met the kids.
Looks like I need some pics soon....

The first actual daycare day

Wow. Her first day away from me! I was so sad today!! All I kept thinking is wow, I'm kind of homesick. I really am starting to second guess this whole going to work thing. She did really well, I think that she likes being around other kids, but I don't know if the "newness" will wear off, and then she will be kicking and screaming when I leave. They play alot outside, which worries me a bit, especially since it's so hot, and she is just getting eaten up with mosquitos.

It's also got me thinking, I'm here at this new school, don't know anyone, and really don't care to. (Sad, I know). I'm trying to learn all the new ways they do things, and their procedures, all the while trying to decorate my room--I'm really just not feeling it! But anyways, all I can think about is how my old room was, how I knew everything, how easy it was to go to another teacher's room and talk, my co-workers (really close to them), just everything didn't feel right today. I was really missing my old school, even though I didn't work there this past year. I just wonder if I screwed myself over, my job was cake. Some of the students weren't, and there was a lot to complain about, but in hindsight, it was pretty easy, and easy going. I was even comparing the faculty bathrooms!! I really hate feeling out of place and being "the new guy". I know that I'm not in this position for the long haul--just this year. We really would like to upgrade our vehicle status without going into debt, so my meager salary will be dedicated to child care and savings. I just really hope that this year will fly by, and maybe I can get some passion into what I teach. Although I have thought about going back into early childhood education, or something totally different like pediatric occupational therapy. Who knows, I change on a daily basis.